I Dont Care Who You Are Thats Funny
Olney, Illinois
March 18, 2020 6:12am CST
But that brings me to my point...the Government should not send $1,000 to each taxpayer to help alleviate financial hardships caused by the COVID-19 panic and shut-downs. Instead, just send each of them a case of toilet paper. 
Because if this keeps up the money will only be worth wiping your *** with anyway. 
________________________________________________________________ *sips coughee*
27 responses
• Canada
18 Mar 20
The Premiere of Ontario advised families to spend their March Break week, which is this week, enjoying themselves, take the trips that they have booked, that was on Friday, yesterday, Tuesday, he had to declare a State of Emergency for the province and no gatherings of more then 50 people. What a joke!
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
More and more places keep either getting shut down or are doing it themselves...it's a madhouse at the moment
• Canada
18 Mar 20
@Susan2015 We had 2 confirmed cases in our city yesterday. Someone at the courthouse was confirmed and that cleared that sector out pretty quickly.
• Canada
18 Mar 20
@myklj999 yesterday there were several chain clothing stores that announced closure, but that their staff would continue to be paid-there are government funds for those businesses. There was significantly less traffic on my drive into work yesterday, and I assume the same will hold true today.
• France
18 Mar 20
We already had a stock market crash because of this lack of toilet paper and thousands of billions vanished in the air. What does the state 
?
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
Our market is on fairly shaky fotting right now
• France
18 Mar 20
@myklj999 It is not better than our market, the fault to computers. When the crash of 1987 happened a share was exchanged every 2 years and 9 months. Today it is every 20 seconds. You can consider that all big businesses are not far to be ruined. In Europe many countries are considering to nationalize some of them.
• India
19 Mar 20
You says correctly. Because of this virus lot of people lot their investment in stock market and crypto too. Don't know how we recover all those once again.
• Austin, Texas
18 Mar 20
I asked a friend how it was going in his part of the world and he replied that he lived in a "green zone". A green zone? First I thought about the movie with Matt Damon. Then I thought he can't mean that. Then it dawned on me he was referring to the tracking map. Red zones show the areas in various parts of the world with the coronavirus. That's when I realized that not every country has been infected and that I actually know somebody who lives in a place that has not been infected. I am happy for him. But it feels weird! You know?
• United States
18 Mar 20
Yep, that's funny. I'm still trying to find out where that stockpile of anti-viral medication they claimed the US had during the swine flu epidemic of 2009 has disappeared to, though.....
• Chile
18 Mar 20
Are you stocked in coughee, JJ?
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
I buy enough at the first of the month for the full month
• Chile
18 Mar 20
@myklj999 Good idea. I woke up with a tiny bit of throat ache. Just in case it is COVID-19, I´ll take a glass of Jack Daniels after lunch
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
@marguicha I only get paid once monthly on the third, so I do my main shopping then
• Ireland
18 Mar 20
@myklj999 @susan2015 My store has no more toilet paper so I bought envelopes today. The paper's a bit stiff and rough but it does the job and o can always post it on to whoever afterwards. Or course to make the paper go further we should be using both sides.
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
And don't forget to flip the envelope inside-out for even more economical use
• France
18 Mar 20
• Cainta, Philippines
18 Mar 20
I prefer the dollars, waheehee.
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
Yes, you could probably wash the dollars and reuse them after wiping your butt with them I suppose
• Cainta, Philippines
18 Mar 20
@myklj999 waheehee that can be, whatever will be, will be.
• St. Catharines, Ontario
18 Mar 20
Glad I stocked up last month when it was on sale, before this unbelievable run on the stuff.
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
I bought a 6 Mega-roll pack of Charmin Ultra-soft around the 3rd, that gives me several months of quality poopwipe. Got lucky it came up on my normal 'stock' list before everyone started freaking out...
• Los Angeles, California
18 Mar 20
Is Illinois experiencing a run on weed like some other places?
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
Just checked my 'local' dispensary menu online, they have vape and edibles but no weed listed currently
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• United States
18 Mar 20
plus a case of TP is now more than a grand each anyway!
• United States
18 Mar 20
You are right about the tp. However, my husband went back to the stores early this morning and was finally able to score some paper products. The customers were grabbing them as soon as they opened up the stacks.
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
I used to have the store to myself and maybe 10 other people when I would go as soon as they opened, now everyone is doing it .
• Staten Island, New York
18 Mar 20
Hopefully no one got physical over tp.
• United States
18 Mar 20
@myklj999 Walmart said that there are lines of people there at 6 am.
• Singapore
18 Mar 20
This is funny but still I believed that you have all the toilet paper.
• Olney, Illinois
18 Mar 20
Yep, stocked on my bathroom shelves right now
• Singapore
18 Mar 20
• Singapore
18 Mar 20
• Bangalore, India
19 Mar 20
His speeches always make headlines. Seems like he purposefully does it. One person who sets the bar of stupid and idiotic talks higher and higher. 
• Philippines
19 Mar 20
good thing there are no toilet paper hoarding here
• Raurkela, India
19 Mar 20
This is ridiculous, I don't think toilet papers are that difficult to manufacture. It might be the businessmen's trick to increase the price of toilet paper.
• Davison, Michigan
19 Mar 20
That has to be the most truest thing I have heard. lol. I really hope things get better though.
• India
19 Mar 20
All political leaders are guilty of underestimating the issue. They still do not cancel buses, trains, aircrafts, and declare movement to illegal. It took them a while to close religious centers! While the pandemic may not kill as many as ebola, quite a few requiring hospitalization may not find a room, or health care workers may drop due to exhaustion. Costs will be incurred either way. Stay safe eat plenty of fruits and drink plenty of water. Hydrating is the key as well as immune system. Keep enough medication to keep temperature down for 30 odd days as it may take that much time to find a room in hospital. Cough syrups too. Do consider your blood pressure condition and take only prescribed medications.
• Guangzhou, China
19 Mar 20
I like your sense of humor. In fact USD1000 can be also work as the toilet paper if they are all banknotes rather than a check
• Daytona Beach, Florida
19 Mar 20
It will be interesting to see if the Walgreens has toilet paper when I go there tomorrow. The only people who would understand the shortage of toilet paper are those who lived in Latvia in Soviet times. There was almost never any toilet paper and people survived. They used rags and newspapers and such.
Source: https://www.mylot.com/post/3351133/i-dont-care-who-you-are-that-is-funny
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